What things should we pay attention while choosing our life partner?
Scientists who make researches on families stated that inter-family conflicts and divorce rates are increasing because people do not make enough researches and get married without having the right information while choosing their life partner.
This is why making life partner choices only based on physiological liking or satisfaction may cause irrecoverable mistakes.
Especially women and children are affected by these mistakes too much. It can be seen that marriages based on physiological liking last a very short time. To prevent the collapse of the homes which are built to be happy for a lifetime, one should take precautions at the beginning.
So, we should give importance to the equality and harmony among the candidates while we are choosing our life partner. We can sum up the equations with the titles below:
It is about the harmony of souls and habits. We should not get married to a person without knowing his or her soul.
How can you meet with someone’s soul? With introducing our soul better which means by stating what we want or do not want clearly. The introductions which are made by lies collapse easily. We can see that kind of relationships end soon.
We can see that emotions have strong influences on these kinds of marriages. This is why its inconveniencies may not be seen at the beginning. If there are no other equations in the relationship, these marriages will not last long.
We call this marriage desire marriage.
The physiological equation is the most important factor which supports psychological equation. It can be seen that the couples who have physiological equation get along better and not possessed with superiority complexes. The most important factor about this equation is taking a shine from the other person. Life partner candidates should take a shine from each other, if they feel a negative energy, it will soon cause bad feelings like hate.
The psychological harmony between couples is very beneficial for physiological harmony. Bodies cannot be in harmony before souls. Women usually give importance to love and being loved in the psychological and physiological equation, for men, on the other hand, the important thing is desire. If there is no psychological equation, physiological harmony will also soon disappear and couples will look other places for finding their peace. In a situation like this, families should get consultancy from a family consultant.
The social equation means growing up in the same environment, sharing the same traditions and having similar social values. This equation is supported by psychological and physiological equations.
If there is no social equation in a relationship, jealousy and despising can be seen in the marriage. The especially social equation between the families of the bride and groom candidates is very important. People evaluate each other according to their social equations, especially in small residential districts. In marriages which do not have the social equation, psychological and physiological equalities can be destroyed in time.
The social equation is important because the social environment which a person has grown up in has a very important effect on that person’s personality especially until 12 years old. The incompatibility between personalities is an enemy for a marriage.
Personality means knowing himself for a person and it also means habits. Moreover, we can say that it is a divine characteristic of a person. This means nobody can change it. Trying to change it is meaningless.
Personality also means the wishes and desires of a person. A person is same on his 7th and 70th. Ethic is another version of habits. We can change our habits according to the information we get, in a negative or positive way. The main thing is the confirmation of our heart for this change. It is thought that everything our heart confirms can be considered as an ethical act and the things it does not confirm means the opposite.
In this stage, either we can get rid of our wrongs which we thought right or we can keep making the same mistakes over and over again.
We can reach the social equation only when we get rid of our wrongs.
The economic equation does not mean being rich or wealthy. It means that families’ economical background equation and especially equations related to business. A person should create and should produce something in his life. If one side of a couple is a hard worker and the other one sits all day, the relationship soon will face with problems. The economic situation of both bride candidates and groom candidates at least should be similar to each other.
Culture means using traditions with material and spiritual values. For example, a word can be used in a very different meaning in the east than it is used in the west. We can give hundreds of examples for this situation. One can see the cultural differences, especially by clothes and rhetoric.
Some regions’ people learn to talk loudly and another region’s people may speak calmly and slowly since they were children. People who have grown up in similar regions can have a cultural equation. If there is no social equation, there will be no peace in a relationship.